So, a little background

My godfather suggested recently that I start a blog about my pregnancy. I already have several, but Compartmentalization Queen that I am, this needed it's own forum.

Background:

I'm 26, just graduated with a degree in Psychology, and wasn't planning on having kids for a few more years.

However, in the hospital to have a titanium pin removed from my clavicle, I received a bit of a surprise: I am pregnant! My boyfriend was ecstatic- I was a little more ambivalent.

And by ambivalent, I mean that I was devastated and spent half the day crying. I wanted a child with D, and we'd talked about it, but not yet. Not without a job, not on the heels of getting my house to myself for the first time ever, not this early in D's and my relationship.

I literally ran away, taking D and running to one of my best friend's houses and staying there all day. The next morning, we went for a blood test and had it confirmed. I was 4-6weeks along, and definitely pregnant.

I won't lie here- I spent several weeks considering an abortion. D and I spent weeks having passionate discussions about it- I was afraid of even trying under these circumstances (for all that they're better than so many other womens'), and he was terrified of losing not only the child he wanted so much, but me.

Weeks of snipping and snarling at one another later, we finally came to the root of the problem:

I couldn't handle his temper and his quick trigger to argue, and he couldn't turn those things off while simultaneously quitting smoking and obsessing about the possibility of losing his child and his girlfriend.

Less than ten minutes later, we were in one another's arms, crying together. I had had no idea how afraid he was, and he'd had no idea what a struggle my physical symptoms had been for me and therefore why my own temper had been so short.

Both of us had blamed our struggling relationship and the other.

Now, we're working together again and getting excited. Our registry is up on Amazon, and we've been slowly telling our friends and family.

There's plenty more to say, but there's the background!