Book Review & Random: Caveman's Guide to Pregnancy

Well, I haven't posted in the last few days because I haven't had much to say that wasn't rehashing the same complaints that I've had- and posted about- for weeks. At least the nausea is slowly improving, provided I don't go too long without eating.

D is reading a book I bought him, "The Caveman's Guide to Pregnancy," which is absolutely hilarious, and leading me to think that I might actually drop all the annoying, vapid, cutesy books designed for me, and just start reading the ones for guys. It's great to read a book with a sense of humor that doesn't tell me the same 5 pieces of information 80 times. In fact, this one emphasizes his role in all this: mostly, taking care of me and taking a larger role in the day-to-day stuff around the house I don't have the energy for.

After the first day he read it, he came home and spent almost 40 minutes massaging my calves, thighs, and ass. I'd fucking love that book for that all on its own- you have no idea how unpleasant (and just plain weird-feeling!) the joint changes in those areas have been if you've never been pregnant.

Speaking of which, I've decided that I'm going to commit to going back to the gym starting in the second trimester. I'm reactivating my gym membership, and going to try and Jack off of it and D on. Surely they won't bitch too much about just changing the name on the account?

Anyway, we're going to start working out together, because my inability to cook (and therefore his eating fast food) is doing nothing good for D's waistline (according to him), and I need to start building up some strength and endurance for the biggest endurance competition I'll ever have to go through. (Thanks, Tara, for giving me that amazing simile a few years ago which is how I have been thinking of childbirth ever since.)

The exhaustion's back. I hate this- I've spent almost all day in bed, and now I'm nauseated from taking my vitamins.

They say second trimester is better.

Please?

Someone else's post: Toxic stereotype is toxic

Why Gamer stereotypes are bad for my kid-to-be, and yours too.

Day-to-day maunderings

Busy last few days, and they've caught up.

I'm exhausted and feel half-sick so I'm taking it easy now that errands are done. Jack has been sick with food poisoning so I made banana bread and gave it to him, then picked up my CSA milk, more cat food, dropped off letters at the post office (missed the mail-lady at home), and took Noka to the vet.

$230 she seems fine, and is up-to-date on shots, but based on her lethargy and anxiety they want to do a cancer screening for another $350. I told them I'll try the homeopathic anti-anxiety medication first, then if she doesn't improve I'll save up for the screening.

I also cleaned out the fridge a little and have a pot of chicken soup going for later.

Now I'm curled up on the couch with the 6th Harry Potter book (I'm re-reading the series) and as little of anything productive as I can manage.

Tuesday I have my next prenatal appointment and I need a new midwife after that. I also need to remember to tell this one about my dizzy spells (they're getting worse) and ask them to screen me for toxoplasmosis immunity.

Maternal Instincts?

When I was 15, I read a book off of my stepmother's shelf called, "Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom."

More than 10 years later, I found it at the library today.

Reading it again, it's strange and interesting- not to mention validating- to realize how many of my instincts regarding this pregnancy have been spot-on.

I feared the fact that I have no sisters, no mother nearby, no grandmothers- no women around me who have been through this and can support and reassure me.

-Studies show that women who feel supported during their pregnancy have significantly lower incidences of prenatal problems and easier deliveries with fewer interventions.

(Subsequently, I've discovered that my fears are relatively unfounded, however- many of my close female friends are thrilled to stand in as my sisters and help and support me through this)

I feared that my child would know that early on I had not been ambivalent, but actively wanted to abort.

-Studies show that children of ambivalent mothers have higher incidences of anxiety, childhood (and adult) illness, and depression.

(Subsequently, I've been talking to belly, reassuring my child that yes, I was scared at first- and I still am!!- but that we both do want them, and love them deeply already.)

I kept feeling a need to slow down, even to the point of what felt like 'stopping' for me. Even once I got some energy back, I'd go an entire day sitting and reading a book or three, stopping only to do basic things like fix a brief meal and go to the bathroom.

-Studies show that increased stress and anxiety in the mother is heavily linked to prenatal problems, difficult deliveries, and lowered immune systems in their children.

Apparently, I have good instincts?

Food!

Ok, my last 3 posts have been bitchy.

I've actually had a few awesome days, they've just only been partially pregnancy-related so I didn't bother to post them.

Also, you probably don't care about my newly rekindled obsession with food.

I love and hate it. I want it constantly, even when my body rejects it. I drool over recipes, but don't have the energy to cook. Wanna see a frustrated, bitchy Noel? Watch me crave delicious foods but not have the energy or steady hands required to cook them.

Now, that said- amazing food is plentiful in my life. In fact, at D's encouragement (not that i required much!) we've returned to the co-op. Woohoooo! Fresh organic fruits, vegetables, meats, dairy, and bread.

Today- once I shut down the computer and go get off my ass, in fact- I'm picking up today's haul:

Fuji apples, bananas, kiwi, mini watermelon, romaine lettuce, butternut squash, yellow squash, green peppers, red potatoes, celery, honey-wheat bread, croissants, a gallon of whole milk, and a half-gallon of chocolate milk.

Next week, I'll add eggs to the order, but I still have tons.

And today we hit Atlantic Station for Food Truck Friday and D got local bbq, while I got a ceasar salad with amaaazing smoked chicken, and we both got King of Pops fresh Georgia peach popsicles. OMG.

Food.

I love it, even when I hate it. LOL

Oh, and I have to briefly brag on D: one of my favorite little things that he does came up today. He insists on pumping at the gas station because he knows I hate the fumes. Even before pregnancy :)

I love my orthopedist, I hate my orthopedist

Have you noticed the level of ambivalence I'm feeling these days about, well, everything? Cuz I sure am. I used to be the most decisive (albeit usually objective!) person on earth.

(You'll see me say this a lot!)- Then I got pregnant.

Anyway.

I still have a titanium pin in my shoulder. Long story short, I broke my left collarbone back in January. It wasn't healing well, so they put a pin in it. It was when I was going in to get it removed that we found out I'm preggers. Yeah- timing fail.

So now I have a swelling uterus and a titanium pin in my shoulder.

This isn't, in fact, the best combination ever.

Fast forward to yesterday: my orthopedist calls me. He's been talking to radiologists and anesthesiologists, and he doesn't feel like he can guarantee me a safe surgery.

Um, dude? You couldn't guarantee me a safe surgery before pregnancy, that's why I signed that little waiver saying that I know that I won't sue you unless you fuck up for incompetence as opposed to normal risks of opening up my body and messing with my bones and muscles.

Fast forward to today. A (very carefully shielded!) x-ray later, he spend 20 minutes convincing me that it's safe to wait until after delivery to remove the pin.... which is, by the way, a complete 180 from what he said before we found out about the pregnancy.

Look, dude. I get that you're not an OB and you're terrified of hurting my child and I appreciate it. That you worry about my (and my child's) global health is AWESOME.

But my OB isn't worried, so I wish you'd stop freaking out. I've researched the chances, and with modern anesthesia and my own healthy system and complete lack of personal or family history of complications, it should be fine.

So we compromised. I have another appointment midway through the second trimester to check on it again, and if the pin looks like it's causing trouble, 2nd trimester is the bets time for surgery. if it looks fine, we'll know we can wait.

Frankly, I'm just not enthused about a surgery that severely limits my ability to use my left shoulder while taking care of a newborn. Because newborns don't ever need to be picked up and supported two-handed, or held with both arms, and I'm sure that I'll never, I dunno, nurse with the right breast and use my left arm for support....